It’s almost June and my calendar from 2015 still hangs on my kitchen wall.

For the first few months of this year, I felt pretty great about myself. At least, until I looked back and realized I hadn’t done much. And by “much,” I mean miniscule, unimportant actions that most would probably frown at and think, “Wow, that’s incredibly boring.”

And they are. But to me, they’re also experiences I didn’t get to have. Memories I’ll never be able to forget for their sheer uselessness.

And that, perhaps, might be the saddest part of all.

So what did I not do, you didn’t ask?

Join a Club

This actually isn’t a “miniscule, unimportant action” by any means, and that’s why it’s at the top of my list.

One of my biggest regrets in high school was not joining a club. Granted, I was the unofficial junior vice president of the debate club my sister ran my sophomore year, but does that really count?

I’ll be charmingly honest here and admit I have no idea which club I’d choose. I’m the type of person that isn’t Miss Perfect at one, solid topic, but I can awkwardly swim my way through a few subcategories.

Dance Club: You want someone who can spastically flail their limbs as if reenacting an octopus’s death throes? I’m your gal.

Computer Club: I own a computer. Does that count?

I could go all day.

Park on Campus

It sounds awful. I want to experience it.

Buy Something from a Vending Machine

Preferably edible. Do they even sell un-edible stuff in vending machines? I wouldn’t know.

Eat in the Cafeteria

Say what you will about the food, at least you’ve had it. I’ve been eyeing the salad bar all year like a person eyes salad.

I’m sorry, were you expecting a witty comparison?

Me, too.

“Please, Sir. May I have some salad?”

Hold a Pity Party

Fliers decorated in glitter and blood would read: “GATHER ALL COLLEGE STUDENTS. POTLUCK AT WHITEHORSE HALL. BRING YOUR BITTER TEARS AND THE SWEET NECTAR OF COLLEGE DEBT.”

Refreshments served by Stachio.

Whistle

This is a lifelong dream of mine that looks as possible as catching wind in a jar. With my luck, that jar could whistle.

Go on the Second Floor of Shuksan Hall.

Or should I say the first? There’s a downstairs to this building that I’ve never laid eyes on, and I don’t think I ever will by choice.

I like the feeling of mystery that comes with not knowing. Are there any classes down there? What if it’s a portal to Narnia at the bottom of those steps, or an underground fighting ring with the Rock Johnson serving as ref?

Something to think about.

So What Now?

Now that you’ve gotten a look at how I’ve dropped the ball, you might be wondering if I’ll set out to scratch these things off my list. After all, I have all of next year to do so.

But by that thinking, I always have the year after that, and one after that…